Volume 24 Issue 1

Features

First Day of Class Horoscopes

Written by: The MQ

Center SpreadFeatures

The Great College Rat Race

Written by: The MQ

Features

The MQ’s Fall Book Club

Written by: The MQ

Features

Snuggies!

Written by: The MQ

Back PageFeatures

How the Government Works 101

Written by: The MQ

ArticlesNewsPolitics

Trump Administration Discovered To Be an Improv Camp for the Wealthy

Written by: The MQ

In the past few weeks, many Americans have been awestruck by how seemingly messily and uncoordinatedly the Trump Administration has been conducting business. However, there seems …

ArticlesLocalNews

Local Man Incorrectly Insists He Finally Knows What LGBT Stands For

Written by: Rhys Shriver

Yesterday, after several weeks of self-proclaimed careful thought and intensive research, local man Ross Christopher has reportedly “finally figured out what LGBT stands for.” “I didn’t …

ArticlesLocalNews

Area Man Mutters He’s Sick of Your Passive Aggression, Still Within Earshot and He Knows It

Written by: Hannah Lykins

San Diego authorities issued a public safety warning on Monday after local businessman Kevin Ansler was seen sitting in a coffee shop with his coworker and …

ArticlesNews

Grammarians Argue Over Reclaiming “Grammar Nazis”

Written by: The MQ

The Punctuation and Elocution Defenders Against Nefarious Terminology (PEDANT) has suffered an internal schism in recent months, as members argued over the question: should they attempt …

ArticlesNewsPolitics

New American Diplomacy Policy Released as “Act First, Don’t Ask Questions Later, Hope No One Else Does Either”

Written by: Hannah Rosenblatt

The White House has recently released a new statement outlining future approaches to foreign policy and international affairs which, according to Press Secretary Sarah Sanders, the …