Summer Davis
Democrats Denounce Trump, Call for Preferred Authoritarian Leader
Congressional Democrats celebrated this month after two major political achievements in January. They succeeded in passing a bipartisan bill which will maintain the Bush-era practice of …
Poll Reveals Gun Rights Rank Above Rights to Life, Liberty, Happiness
In the wake of one of the deadliest mass shootings in modern history, polling of Americans revealed that the majority of those surveyed agree with expanding …
Area Woman Petitions for Overseas Siblings to Become U.S. Citizens, Excited to Reunite in Two Decades
San Diego resident Minda Bennett recently completed the process for petitioning her two older siblings, Jose and Mellie Edualino, to join her in the U.S. Given …
The Walking Dead Kills Character, Asian Americans Lose Half of Representation
In the season seven premiere of zombie-apocalypse show, “The Walking Dead,” fan-favorite character Glenn Rhee was brutally killed. Rhee’s death was upsetting to the Asian-American community …
Nation Needs Mariah Carey to Wish for Snow
Environmental scientists discovered the true cause of climate change; they believe that all environmental catastrophes can be traced back to the year 1994, when Mariah Carey …
NBC realizes Human Trafficking “Not As Funny As Expected”
In a statement issued after the cancellation of the planned comedy show Mail Order Family, NBC expressed regrets that “sadly human trafficking is a concept that …
Recently Reopened Planned Parenthood Re-closed
The national debate over reproductive rights took yet another unexpected turn as a Texas abortion clinic was re-closed for the 47th time since its opening in …
NFL Players to Undergo Pre-Draft Jiggle Test
NFL Commissioner Roger Goodell has proposed new protocols for drafting players. According to new regulations, NFL prospects will be tested on their skin’s ability to “jiggle …
Californians Forced to Choose Between Water and Food, Almonds Win
In a historic referendum late last month, Californians decided that they would rather try to survive without water than go without food. Governor Jerry Brown put …
Far Right Calls for End to Annual Migration of Monarch Butterflies
The presidential campaign took yet another interesting turn late last month, as a far-right political party called for a press conference to demand a stop to …
