Kaz Nuckowski
Hanukkah Cut to Seven Days Due to Oil Shortage
“The oil lasting for eight days was no miracle,” said Zelda. “Back then, people didn’t live under Joe Biden’s gas prices.”Photo by Sharon Roth As the holiday …
Aggressive Hurricanes Battle for the Right to Destroy Gulf Coast
Aggressive Hurricanes Battle for the Right to Destroy Gulf Coast Meteorologists and climate scientists are in agreement that global warming is creating more aggressive weather — …
La Jolla Family Rents Out Doghouse to UCSD Student Amidst Housing Crisis
“I like having the extra money,” said Mrs. MacInson. “But I no longer have a place to send my husband to when he messes around with …
LEGO US Releases Nation Building Sets, Parts Recalled for Injuring Future Generations
China has reportedly been buying the LEGO sets in large numbers, eager to get a sneak peek at US military designs.Photo by Maria Dhilla In what one …
Dr Pepper Forced to Pay Fine When Drink is Revealed to Contain Less Than 20% Doctors
It has notes of arrogance and student loans.Photo by Sharon Roth A high profile class-action lawsuit against Doctor Pepper over the doctoral composition of the eponymous soft …
E3 Delayed After Announcement for E4: “Innovating a Better, Faster, Smarter” Gaming Convention
In partnership with the Entertainment Software Association, Nintendo is proud to announce that the 2021 edition…
Get Ready to Deadname Birdetta in the Long- Anticipated Captain Rainbow: Trans-formed
Fans of Captain Rainbow no longer have to wait for new content. The long-awaited sequel, Captain Rainbow: Trans-formed, is coming to Switch this Fall…
Why did Wario bite me?
Why did Wario bite me? Wario has long been known as Mario’s evil counterpart, but few fans know the lore surrounding Wario’s descent to the dark …
Local Student Takes 2-Hour Bus Ride for Brief Social Interaction
Local Student Takes 2-Hour Bus Ride for Brief Social Interaction In a desperate attempt to engage with online college friends, local second-year student Kris Nunjowsky reportedly …
I Was the Lone AXE Body Spray Left Behind: This is My Story
After the aftermath of the insurrection on Capitol Hill, reporters searched furiously for the best photograph to encapsulate the experience of what many are calling “the …
