The MQ
Top Ten Similarities Between a DMV Office and the Mariana Trench
You can pee anywhere and no one will care At least the water cooler is full Threat of drowning, in paperwork or otherwise Both are Paul …
Top Ten Things Overheard on Move-in Day
I’ve Googled it a bunch, but I still don’t know who this Sixth person is I aced all of high school, so I’m sure I’ll have …
Classmate Boldly Repeats Professor
The podcast for the COGS 101A class from September 23rd caught flack earlier this week for wasting students’ time by having an apparent glitch which caused …
Jason from Third Floor to Be Your Best Friend for Life
Analysts predict that Jason Mathis from the third floor, who you met coming into your dorm on move-in day, will be your best friend through your …
Literature Building Scheduled for Demolition: Deemed Definitely Maybe Irrelevant
In a recent press release, UCSD has announced that the Literature Building is scheduled for demolition by 2018, after years of safety concerns. This comes as …
Therapy Fluffies Wait Time Over Four Weeks
Students at UCSD who depend on university resources like therapy dogs for their stress relief are no strangers to long lines and disappointing sessions, but many …
Arizona Teen Announces Readiness to Go “Full Emo” If Stepfather’s Sanctions Continue
Citing “bullshit rules,” and a household being run “like a freaking dictatorship,” 14-year-old Brandon Plank from Scottsdale, Arizona announced that he would consider taking “drastic measures” …
Ecological Survey Sheds Light on Uncharted Depths of SIO
Scripps Institute of Oceanography is one of the oldest and most important parts of UCSD. Yet despite the close relationship UCSD shares with Scripps, there is …
Population Embarks on Operant Conditioning of Government
In a new Gallup poll, a majority of Americans have admitted to being part of a large grassroots effort to try to train the government to …
What’s With All This Hullabaloo About Hamilton?
As a historian, I am naturally inclined to be excited when anything historical becomes a subject of interest outside of my field. However, I am truly …
