June 3, 2026 You look delectable. Volume XXXII Issue VII

Top Ten Ways to Win an Argument

Top Ten

Written by: The MQ

March 11, 2026

  1. Piss your pants
  2. Dark Psychology
  3. Virtue signal harder
  4. Passive-aggressive Instagram note
  5. Cry really loudly then say, “I can’t handle confrontation”
  6. Tell them to stand up straight when they talk to you
  7. Kiss them passionately — with tongue
  8. Question their education
  9. Bring God into it
  10. Fucking punch them

The MQ

The premier satire publication at UC San Diego.

Last modified: March 9, 2026