June 3, 2026 You look delectable. Volume XXXII Issue VII

Top Ten Coping Mechanisms

Top Ten

Written by: The MQ

February 4, 2026

  1. Remember
  2. Celsius through IV
  3. FaceTime a mom
  4. Skip class and take a nap
  5. Go to the zoo to remind yourself that at least you’re not in a cage
  6. Hire a dominatrix to whip you into shape
  7. Try out Christianity, again
  8. Eat an orange in the shower
  9. One gallon of mayo
  10. Forget

The MQ

The premier satire publication at UC San Diego.

Last modified: February 2, 2026