As national outcry against ICE sweeps across the nation and constituents call upon their representatives to “finally do something,” Democrat leaders released a statement sharing the news that they have found “yet another straw” to be their last one, preventing them from “actually doing anything.”
“I know we keep saying that we’re going to actually start trying once the final straw has been drawn, but we found another one so…see you suckers next scandal; I’m going to Cancún!” said Hakeem Jeffries (D-NY).
The “miraculous” extra straw was reportedly found in between the sofa cushions of the Democrat game-and-karaoke room located on the second floor of the Capitol Building. Head Democrats then brought forward a motion to create a committee to form a group to plan a discussion to choose a committee to make a movement to search for more straws so that next time will “definitively be the last straw.” Unfortunately, they did not reach a unanimous vote on the motion, as seven of them decided to flip against it “for no reason.”
Jules was born from a stone egg near Flower Fruit Mountain. Shortly after his birth, he became king of the monkeys that lived on the mountain. He then went on to gain immortality 9 times and also cause havoc in heaven. He has now retired to write for the MQ.
