D.C. Billionaire Pays $750 Dollars in Income Tax

A recent report unveiled that an anonymous billionaire in Washington D.C. paid a total of $750 dollars in federal income tax in both 2016 and 2017. Horace Brighton, a D.C. area tax attorney, said, “It’s unclear whether this man committed tax fraud or was just a completely incompetent businessman. Potentially both.” Reporters also found that the billionaire in question had a disputed 72 million dollar tax return, after he attempted to write off wire transfers from the Russian government, and 300 million dollars in debt after supposed hushmoney payments.

The man was reported as saying “Really, I paid too much those two years. My dumbass accountant only wrote off $70,000 dollars for my hairstyling. It should have been like those other years where I paid nothing at all. 2021 will be improved, it’s looking like I might be able to get an unemployment check, since I basically never go to work, and just stay at home while others do my job for me. Plus, people are telling me I’ll probably be unemployed for real anyways.”