Volume 31 Issue 1
I Bet I Could Do Olympic Gymnastics if I Really, Really Wanted To
Another year goes by and another round of Olympic Games has come and gone, and all these damn kids online keep raving about these damn Olympic …
‘The Astronauts Are Fine,’ Says Boeing
“Day two hundred and seventy-one. Atlas shrugged,” read one astronaut’s logs.Photo by Dylan Schmidt A month after announcing that the Boeing Starliner astronauts will remain in …
Satan Attracts America With ‘Eternal Suffering Healthcare Plan’
“I’ve always thought that the Hippocratic Oath was really up to interpretation,” said Satan.Photo by Dylan Schmidt W ith the dissolution of the Affordable Care Act, …
