Volume 31 Issue 1
‘The Astronauts Are Fine,’ Says Boeing
“Day two hundred and seventy-one. Atlas shrugged,” read one astronaut’s logs.Photo by Dylan Schmidt A month after announcing that the Boeing Starliner astronauts will remain in …
Satan Attracts America With ‘Eternal Suffering Healthcare Plan’
“I’ve always thought that the Hippocratic Oath was really up to interpretation,” said Satan.Photo by Dylan Schmidt W ith the dissolution of the Affordable Care Act, …
I NEED the Library to Be Open 24/7 vs. Who Actually Needs 24 Hours to Study Anyway?
POINT: I NEED the Library to Be Open 24/7 I’d like to start off by saying that Geisel is my favorite study spot. Come midterms and …
