- I pushed Timmy down a well
- You really need to do a better job fake-crying if you really want that Emmy
- Be sure to drink your Ovaltine
- Hillary Clinton knew full well what was going to happen in Benghazi three days early
- For the love of God, please vaccinate me
- You’ve been served. This is legally binding
- I know who the Zodiac Killer is
- Nothing. It was all CGI
- You left out six chocolate bars yesterday so I don’t know how tomorrow will go
- Oh, I forgot my line
Top Ten Things Lassie Was Actually Trying to Tell You
Last modified: February 2, 2019
