Top Ten Ways to Get Your Parents to Buy You Nintendo Games

1. Hold your breath
2. Start crying in Target
3. Pretend to like WWII enough to sit through a documentary with your father
4. Convince them it’s actually your birthday
5. Steal it from GameStop so it’s a crime if they don’t
6. Every time you pass buy a gaming display, tell your friends, “But I really love that game,” and it’ll roll to your house like the old Chef Boyardee commercials
7. It may seem counterintuitive, but bribe them
8. Say it promotes the word of Christ
9. Pull out all your teeth and put them under your pillow
10. Ask really, really nicely