Top Ten Ways to Make Sure Your Vote Gets Counted

10. Vote several times just to make sure
11. Ask very nicely
12. Show up in person with no mask—they’ll know who to put you down for
13. Copy your friend’s answer
14. Hand your ballot to your county clerk with a 20 dollar bill and wink
15. Eat it, pass it, and when the UCSD COVID-19 sewage screening people see it, they’ll send it in
16. Be a corporation
17. Put yourself in the envelope
18. “One vote, ah ah ah, two votes ah ah ah”
19. You can’t—the election was yesterday