Leftist Suffers Brain Damage Seeing “More Lib Shit On Twitter”
Twitter user @GayRevolverOcelot tweeted that they committed themselves to the local clinic, claiming they suffered brain damage from “all the libshit [they] saw on Twitter.”
Through a series of interconnected tweets written by them, @GayRevolverOcelot was wheeled into the medical ward, yelling, “No, I don’t care about Obama you stupid libs!” before a scan was run on their brain. To medical experts’ surprise, the test results run on the brain scan showed an anomaly on @GayRevolverOcelot’s frontal lobe. When asked for a comment, Dr. Ruiz stated, “We ran the test as a gag, just to get this lefty to shut up for once, but to our surprise, there was something there: an implant. Upon further investigation we realized it was an electronic device created by the Lincoln Project.”
Dr. Ruiz went on to explain that the device was equipped with a chemical that flooded @GayRevolverOcelot’s brain with “nonsensical issues and advocations for the chance that white supremacists should be able to speak too.” Dr. Ruiz continued, saying: “These ideas flooding @GayRevolverOcelot’s brain were alarming to them, which is the reason they brought themselves to the hospital.” The origin of these implants can be traced back to a tweet by the Lincoln Project stating, “Retweet this if racism was more awesome when we in the ol’ GOP did it!”
Andrew Sitko was recently arrested by the comedy police and charged for Possession of Killer Jokes. This is their second offense following a Grand Larceny charge from January 27th, 2003.