November 1, 2023 Read it and weep profusely. Volume XXX Issue II

Written by: The MQ

Top Ten Reasons Why the UC’s Tuition is the Same Even Though You’re Remote Learning

  1. Because they can
  2. UCSD blew a lot of money on Skype stock back in April
  3. Khosla needs a premium account for
    Club Penguin
  4. Eighth college isn’t going to build itself
  5. The MQ still needs our funding
  6. The UC has to fund its own morally
    ambiguous person to take the name for Sixth College
  7. Rock Bear needs to be fed, and human sacrifices aren’t cheap.
  8. They just want things to feel like they’re normal again
  9. Khosla thinks it’s unfair that he didn’t get a stimulus check
  10. It’s what God hath wrought

The MQ is the premier satire magazine at UC San Diego

Leave a Reply

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *