You did two lessons of Spanish on Duolingo before giving up because you couldn’t roll your R’s
You actually started to look at horoscopes
You’ve gotten really into oat milk
You’re either sleeping for three hours at a time or 13 hours. Nothing in between
You Zoom-bombed your mom’s virtual bible study
You got mad at your boba place for being nonessential
You tried picking up a book. Not to read it, just to see how much it weighed
You were an asshole and spit on produce
You pensively place your hand against a windowpane every day searching for meaning in this prison
You let a bunch of stray cats into the house to do your part for the world
You’ve been standing up really fast and getting lightheaded
You’ve been going on silly little walks about the neighborhood
The premier satire magazine at UC San Diego.
