November 1, 2023 Read it and weep profusely. Volume XXX Issue II

Written by: The MQ

  1. Touched the thermostat
  2. Fumbled the nuclear football
  3. Fed grapes to Joe Biden’s dog
  4. Actually shot someone in the middle of Fifth Avenue
  5. Didn’t use a coaster on the Resolute Desk
  6. Refused the peaceful transfer of the POTUS Twitter account
  7. Broke his Snapchat streak with Kim Jong Un
  8. Ate the last critically-endangered hawksbill turtle
  9. Double-dipped at a formal function
  10. Lied on TRUTH Social

The MQ is the premier satire magazine at UC San Diego

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