You know how this goes: the horse races. The ol’ equine escapades. The mare-athon. The track and field for big dogs. The mosey for your posey. You get the gist. Everyone knows there are three great aspects of horse racing — the costume, the horses, and the homoerotic tension between you and your rival as the horses you both bet on are neck and neck around the bend. We at the MQ love going to the races. It consumes our souls. We dress, we bet, we bicker. There is no feeling truly equal to seeing some sweaty pissing freaks of nature running around in circles as you wear a fancier outfit than your sexy adversary. Truly, the pinnacle of human achievement.
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