- I mean, I guess this beats crucifixion
- Wow I definitely thought I was going to Hell
- Beam me up, Scotty
- Wait until my father hears about this
- Please don’t whitewash me in future paintings
- Oh no, not again
- Please don’t yell my name when you’re having sex
- No one look up my robe
- Jesus OUT
- Haha, these losers think I’m returning
- It’s Jesus, bitch
- I left a million dollars in the …
- Jesus Fucking Christ
- Whatever you do, don’t start a religion based on me
- God is a woman
Top Fifteen Little Known Things Jesus Said While Ascending to Heaven
Last modified: January 15, 2019
