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Top Ten Similarities between Jury Duty and Microwaving a Three-Day-Old Burrito

  1. Your parents warned you that you’d have to do it eventually, but you never believed them
  2. “Oh God, I hope they don’t realize I was the one who did it”
  3. You spent as much time as you could in the bathroom
  4. It’s the only way you know you’re a true American anymore
  5. You’re not sure how this is legal
  6. Gives you time to think about much-needed reform to the justice system
  7. Your boss didn’t take it as a valid excuse to miss work
  8. You left the country to avoid this
  9. It felt unnecessary to wear a suit to this
  10. It’s not the mold that bothers you, but the injustice

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