Written by: The MQ

  1. You always feel the need to poop 15 minutes afterwards
  2. Part of Dad’s morning ritual
  3. Cause of a screaming match with the Anaheim Starbucks barista
  4. Freud’s failed business predicted everyone wanted them
  5. Sometimes get your name wrong
  6. Somehow get both more bland and bitter over time
  7. All the other ones are hot
  8. There was probably some point in your life you couldn’t survive without them
  9. Pair well with whiskey
  10. After a while they just leave a bad taste in your mouth and a headache
  11. 80 percent water and 20 percent caffeine
  12. Represent an increase in suburban gentrification
  13. Doesn’t dissolve sugar well
  14. Complicit in proliferation of wage slavery in third world countries
  15. Won’t do anything to change lack of internal motivation

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