Politically Prescient
You’ve seen it, I’ve seen it, we’ve all seen it. That little orange thing that’s been all over the news lately. Such a dumb person in charge with a voice to match. I’m glad that everybody around him is running the ship effectively and being honest politicians, but I just can’t believe that this country has come to this. I mean yes, we had problems under Joe Biden, like that time the iPhone 16 wasn’t that different from the iPhone 15, or when Amazon took a whole day longer to ship my packages than they promised. I’m not saying it wasn’t a struggle then. We were all feeling the pain. But after becoming more informed by watching the news, there’s so much more at risk! We’re not far from planes falling right out of the sky. What if something I ordered is on that plane?! It’s time to act now before it’s too late.
We the people can fix this. There is a tool available to us that is rock-solid, fair, and impossible to interfere with: the United States electoral system. Yes, they rioted outside the Capitol in 2021, and yes, election committees across the country are filled with partisan individuals who have promised undying loyalty to those who want to make this country a less friendly place. That’s just free speech though, and at the end of the day, we have to respect it. I know that the system will prevail. The system, the infallible system, will save us once again my friends, just as it did in 2020. Our system just hit a little bit of a snag and got us into this unfortunate situation all the way back in 2016. It just makes sense that we need to preserve, not interfere with the system. Plus it’ll be so nice to not have to worry about climate change any longer!
I propose that on Election Day, if there’s no bad weather or armed militias patrolling polling stations, the people vote like our two-day shipping and cheap TVs depend on it — because they do. I’ve read up on the infographics (except the ones from those Instagram accounts that have those scary war pictures) and am armed to the teeth with the latest New York Times and Washington Post op-eds. Until then, we can hit the streets, proudly displaying our protest permit and making sure not to block anyone on their commute, of course! That’ll show them!
